Spring of 2016, I attended the School of Creativity at Bethel Church. At the time that I registered, I would not have said that I was a creative. In fact, my confession was that there was not a creative bone in my body. I signed up for the conference, because I felt the familiar nudge of the Holy Spirit. I was being obedient.
The first day of the conference, the lies that I had believed, fell off like a discarded garment! I had believed that I had no talent, that I couldn’t draw, that I had nothing to offer. Once those lies dropped off, I felt free in the wide open spaces of God!! Joy filled my heart! I actually saw myself running in a field of wildflowers!
Then God downloaded into my heart, a book for me to write. And He released me in the area of painting. I began to seriously pursue watercolor. My confession became, “I am an artist!”
I attended the School of Creativity again earlier this year (2018). Again, it nourished my spirit, and encouraged my creativity. Yet, I didn’t have a tremendous breakthrough of freedom as I had the previous year. Or so I thought . . . .
During the conference this year, I bumped into someone from my own church back home. She was lamenting the fact that we needed “something” like this in our area. So I encouraged her to start “something,” and that I would support her. What I didn’t know is that the “something” she was referring to was worship dance. Yikes!!
So then I was backpedaling. I was trying to figure out how I could honor my word to support her .. . without actually having to dance!
Two days later, she asked me to participate in a dance at our church’s annual camp . . . in front of Everyone, including visitors! Double Yikes!! As I was mumbling some excuses, God reminded me of a dream He had given me 5 years earlier. In this dream, I was up on stage with all the other women of our church, dancing. I suddenly became embarrassed by dancing in front of people, so I got down from the stage and sat in the front row of the church. Obviously, God was speaking to me.
For the last 5 months, God has been speaking to me about worship dance. He has highlighted it in His Word. He has spoken prophetic words through others who have no idea of God’s dealings with me. He has arranged invitations to workshops and classes. So finally, I asked God, why He loves worship dance. He said, “It reveals a heart of passion for ME! And it moves My heart!”
God is wanting to free me of my fear of looking ridiculous and the other lies that I have believed. Lies such as: I have no grace or rhythm, or I can’t remember all the steps, etc. God wants to free me from anything that hinders my worship of Him! He wants me free to express my passion for HIM!! And that’s what I want too. I want to move the heart of God with my passionate worship dance!!
So here I am. I am the shy, awkward, wallflower gingerly taking the hand of my Beautiful Bridegroom. He is coaxing me to the dance floor. I am nervous and reluctant, but His reassuring smile builds my confidence. I am making a start. I have said, “Yes!” I am not yet dancing with joyous abandonment like King David. But someday I will.
It is my destiny!